Hi! I’m Natalie Britt.
At the pinnacle of my ‘big life’ I ran a successful training business, had a lovely home and was mum to two wonderful children. People used words like “lucky” and “amazing” around me quite a lot but that’s not how I felt.
As an adoptive mum, I was struggling to step into the role of motherhood and felt more like a glorified babysitter. I was filled with fear, doubt and self-judgement. What kind of monster was I if I couldn’t be a decent mother?
I started to think that the “not enough” feelings I’d been trying to outrun my whole life were feelings I should have listened to. Perhaps if I had, I wouldn’t have sentenced two children to a life with me as their mum.
We’d visit friends and I’d watch other mums with their kids and feel devastated that I was nothing like them. The naturalness of the relationship, the ease of physical contact, the way their kids trusted them unquestioningly. Quite often, I’d end up sitting in bathrooms crying alone.
The story of how I got from those darkest, lowest points to the point of writing this is a long one. Here’s the short version.
Before adopting my kids, I thought hard work and perseverance were the answer to everything. I pushed myself constantly and when people said I was too hard on myself, I ignored them on the basis that their standards were too low.
In the lead up to the adoption, I sat in training room after training room, listening to lectures about the effects of early life trauma on children’s brains and I thought, “Not my kids. I’m well trained, I know how miraculous the brain is and I’m not stopping until I’ve done everything I possibly can for them.” There was no way my kids were getting consigned to the future being painted before me. My kids were going to thrive.
I thought my vision made me hopeful and positive. What I didn’t realise was that it also made me pushy and judgemental. My vision was yet another product of my ‘not enough’ style of thinking.
What would happen if my kids didn’t thrive? What did thriving even mean?
I realised I didn’t know – at least not in a way that would promote a sense of ‘enoughness’ in them. Theoretically, I had ‘thrived’ and I was hiding in bathrooms crying most weekends!
Big Happy Life was born out of my desire to find answers and build a life in which I felt happy and I could parent in ways that promoted my children’s sense of ‘enoughness’. I still have loads to learn but that’s half the fun now. The massive shifts I’ve seen in my own life as a result of the small, incremental changes I’ve made have been staggering. If you saw my kids with me now, you’d be flabbergasted to discover we have no biological link.
When I started to see the effects of my own transformation on my kids, I knew it was worth using the decades of experience I had as a trainer and coach to start talking about the things I had learned and help other people who wanted to achieve the same things in their lives.
So that’s what I do now. I help parents find their own ‘enoughness’ and chart their course to a life they love living. I do this so that the parents I work with can help shape the generations who will ultimately follow in their footsteps. My hope is that, together, we’ll contribute to a world that gets better, generation by generation.
To help a million parents feel enough so they can help their kids feel the same.
Big Happy Life is based on four foundational beliefs:
My beliefs make me easy to talk to. In our sessions, you will find acceptance, listening and empathy and you’ll feel safe to share thoughts and feelings you might never have expressed before.
Our conversations will allow you to know yourself in a way you didn’t before and, through that knowing you’ll find new options and new possibilities open up to you.
I will be your strongest supporter, your greatest advocate and the person who always believes in you and your ability to achieve the things you want to achieve or make the changes you want to make. Not only will I stand beside you as you learn, experiment and shape your life, I will help you challenge yourself, smash through limiting beliefs, overcome obstacles and use your voice with power and influence. Your communication with yourself will change and, as a natural progression from there, your communication with others will change too.
When you feel better, you’ll do better in every area of life. You’ll access strength you didn’t realise you possessed, make choices that align with your values and priorities and find joy in and around you every day.