What I didn’t realise at the time is that each of us is an expression of our history and experiences – and that some of those experiences shape us in ways that cause us to react counter-productively.

In my case, when I got scared or overwhelmed, my pattern was to withdraw – but that caused more problems in terms of bonding with my kids and also left me feeling such guilt and stress that I’d only add to the overwhelm.

It didn’t take long for me to get caught in a vicious cycle that spiralled into depression and feelings of abject failure as a mum.

Naturally, I couldn’t stay in that state and, very fortunately, I had my experience as a corporate coach and trainer to fall back on – all that work on empathy, listening and compassion was, for once, being directed at me.

I started trying to figure out what it took to live a life that felt good, become the mum I imagined I’d be before the kids arrived and, most importantly, give my children the chance to heal from the trauma they’d experienced earlier in their lives.

Now I help other parents whose patterns are keeping them stuck and who want to free themselves to be the amazing parents they were destined to be.